Comic Reviews: Uncanny X-Men [Reloaded] 444-445, Global Frequency 12

6/11/2004

Uncanny X-Men 444-445: The first two issues of Claremont and Davis' X-Men Reload title have now come and gone, and it gives me a little queasy chill, like I'm about to get nailed for not washing the dishes by ole Papa Robot, bellowing from the TV room...this isn't a Reload, it’s a RESTORE. Gone are Claremont's more recent indulgent forays into expository dialog and near incomprehensible script discontinuity, thankfully. But also missing are the mature thematic tones and wry, edgy script work that have graced the X-Men franchise since Grant Morrison took on the title a few years ago.

Granted, Uncanny never was able to catch the tail of Morrison's post-comic comic, and languished under the hands of a rotating cast of awkward, though sometimes successful, creative teams. But since Uncanny's creators switched to new X-Men, I suppose we are now left with two wayward books instead of just the original Uncanny, which had become something like New X-Men's uncomfortably socially inept boozy cousin laughing too loudly at the party. Anyway, not only have they pulled back from the brink of thought-provoking realism, and of course surrealism, but they have time-slipped back to 1985.

It's creepy stuff. Alan Davis' linework is the same, just as perfect and clean and curvaceous as always, with the slightly unsettling smiling faces and constant hovering. Don't get me wrong, I love Alan Davis' artwork. Along with Brett Blevins, he taught me much about drawing spandexy woman sexy without being slutty (which I promptly forgot.) However, it's more the content of the art here that is such a throwback. First, we have the return to costumes: that still doesn't sit well with me, as many characters are wearing random X-brand wishy-washy ensembles like the 90s were littered with, driving me insane then and now. But also, we have a return to Claremont's logic-bending, sensational writing style: everyone's mad with hatred at the mutie menace, with one or two lone voices of compassionate reason (Claremont LOVES to show ordinary people displaying some emotional empowerment, frequently with such indulgence that entire story arc are dedicated to Jane, the anti-seal-clubbing activist who is just so charming and special and enduring and brave that six super-heroes are going to follow her around for a few issues) and immeasurable, un-scalable mystery threats lurking around the corner at all times. It's one of the things that always drove me crazy as a kid. I wanted consistent logic behind not only the motive of an attacker, but how the ensuing struggle would play out. It's not surprising I got into a Marvel Super heroes RPG habit young: it was the only way to instill some order and relative logic to these characters in combat. Stuff like in this issue, where Wolverine, regardless of his apparent injured state, is being slapped around and cuffed by some angry cops, or when various characters with terribly-over-powered PSY abilities, are instantly rendered blind by whatever threat is looming. And the cameras and other surveillance gear go out on cue, and then back on when plot demands it, while every character in the book is written identically, regardless of power, personality or experience.
Claremont is veering dangerously close to his old habit, where the same expository language rolls from panel to panel, with word balloon whips just popping from mouth to mouth. This wasn't quite there yet, but I don't have high hopes. Still, a mediocre book written by a ham like Claremont who at least has enough respect and, let's say obsession, over the X-Men continuity, and the beautiful work of Alan Davis to execute these stories, is a far cry better than much of what we've seen in the past year.



As for characters, most of Claremont's crew here bore me to tears, except for the original "new" X-Men, in which case I probably sub-consciously fall back on my retroactive appreciation for the first time I saw Alan Davis draw them so many years ago. I don't like Sam Guthrie de-aged and downgraded to whelp again, particularly after everything that happened in the last months of the X-Force experimentation, and nothing will get me interested in Bishop. Ever. Sage I can handle, but maybe it's because Davis draws her in all the latex. Similarly, the new Marvel Girl, who may or may not be Rachel Summers, which confuses me to no end because I haven't been reading Claremont's Extreme X-Men soap opera, is bearable, but again, go-go skirts and shocking hair. Hard not to like it, at least under Davis' hand. So, jury's still out on this RESTORE of X-men to a simpler, teenage-minded time, but I certainly do miss the great Morrison experiment left behind.

5/10 Clicks

:::



Global Frequency 12: This was a sad experience, reading these pages. Not because they were a disappointment. On the contrary, this issue is of the best of the series. Rather, that Global Frequency is over. Oddly enough, it’s not a massive, earth-shattering, everybody dies implosion like you might expect to wrap up this tale, but…just another GF incident. And a great one to encapsulate the title as a whole. It’s a perfect self-contained tale, as they all have been, with a global threat only those on the Global Frequency can resolve, with a cascading series of complications forcing an ultimate solution to an impossible problem. Again, we meet a number of first-time GF agents called to duty, though in this event, EVERY agent on the frequency has been activated, which has never happened before. The threat is absolute, with no mind to reason with, no foe to thwart. The threat, oddly, appropriately enough, is an insidious variant of Reagan’s Star Wars program. An autonomous, antiquated battle satellite constellation utilizing old-school weaponry. Not 40 yr. old nukes, mind you, but giant carbon spears dropped out of orbit into the atmosphere with precision, creating a nuclear level payload without the radiation. In other words, a rock that doesn’t break up in entry. And they’re all apparently aimed at major cities worldwide, as a human population stopgap. The satellites cannot be communicated with, and there’s no way of getting someone up there to dismantle them…is there? At it’s core, this is a story about both the obvious danger of our horrible doomsday weapons aimed at ourselves and their capability of slipping out of our control (or being misused by the governments that deployed them,) with a poignant reminder that the agents of the Global Frequency are called in to do what they must, that no one else can, and that this terrible responsibility comes with the potential for extreme sacrifice. This was a wonderful way of book-ending the series, and will be especially powerful in trade format. A must read reminder of how great this series has been, and how Planetary can be done, when and if it ships.

10/10 Clicks!

So says...Wrongrobot!


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